[On The Real] Sexual Grooming

Andile Jiyane and Sibusisiwe Maphumulo once again held an open discussion, addressing gender related issues with Denmark Vee on the AM2MP


Today they discussed sexual grooming, rape and under age sex and what the constitution says about it.

Andile said sexual grooming is an adult male/female develops a relationship with a child and develops an emotional relationship with them in attempt to one day rape them.

“This process may take weeks, months or even years,” Andile said

The ladies recently went to the screening of The Tale, written and directed by documentarian Jennifer Fox based on her own experiences of Sexual Grooming.

The film follows Jenny (Laura Dern) as she reevaluates the first “relationship” she had with an adult man when she was just 13 years old. Disoriented, she weaves in and out of her own experiences, determined to understand a past that she’s been revising all her life.

According to Sibusiswe, the movie is about how adults create a secured relationship with a minor which leads to them believing that what is going on is right, as well as tactics to lure the child.

“I would advise you to watch the movie on M-net soon because it will be an eye opener for many who are not aware of what is sexual grooming,” she said.

The person creates feeling and a relationship between themselves and the child, and introduce them to sex which I’ve time leads to rape.

Sibusisiwe believes that it is usually a child that has a low self-esteem that falls victim to this type of sexual abuse. She said perpetrators uses the child’s lack of self-esteem to gain their trust and try to make them feel good about themselves before abusing them sexually.

Sibusisiwe also described sexual grooming and rape as form of abuse that doesn’t happen in the same way.

“Rape is instant while grooming can take place over a certain period, also rape is not always committed by a close acquaintance it can be anyone and they don’t develop a ‘loving’ relationship with the victim,” she said.

In closing, Andile urged people to look out for signs that someone who is close to them might be sexually abuse.

Sibusiswe advised parents to follow up suspicious behavior they may lead to this kind of a problem.

“We hope that this discussion will be eye opening for many in understanding these different situations which you or someone you may know have experienced,” Sibusisiwe said.

Listen to the clip below for more information:

Listen to On The Real on the AM2PM with Denmark Vee, Andile and Sibusisiwe  every Wednesdays from 12 midday.

By Mndaba Lindelani


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